I am not usually one to post emotional things on my blog…I don’t know why but it was just never my thing. I like the idea of talking about it and it being more personal, rather than exposing it to the world. But this instance deserves some publicity because I’m really nostalgic at the moment.
My Uncle Is Listening
For those of you who don’t know, my uncle Josh, pictured above, passed away on April 15, 2007. It came as a shock to all of us, and the most tragic part was that my cousin Aurora, also pictured, celebrated her 3rd birthday a week later without him.
Throughout the past coupled of months I’ve often wished that there were a way I could just give him one last hug, before he passed – or have one last conversation about his new car – or help him carry Aurora to the car one last time, as she leaves for the weekend.
Well tonight, I was taking a nap, and one of those feelings came true. Now, I haven’t had many dreams about Josh since he passed away. In fact, I can only remember there being one other one. But, in both dreams, he was in my grandparents house, and we all knew that he had died, but were trying to keep the fact that he was back from my grandmother, because we didn’t want to scare her. Both dreams, that was the underlying plot.
The first dream was brief. I was sitting in the living room looking at the dining room table, and there was a single light on Josh sitting where my grandmother usually sits when she drinks tea in the morning. He and I were talking, and I remember saying something along the lines of, “Wait, why are you here?” and then he smiled at me. That’s all I can remember from that dream which happened a few months ago.
Today I was thinking about hugging him again, and how good it would feel to just be able to say goodbye. So tonight, when I was napping that very thing happened, and it was euphoric beyond words. I was in the bathroom, about to walk out, and my aunt Michelle (Josh’s sister) was walking towards me with a big smile on her face. Closely following was Josh smiling at me as well. He was wearing a white long-sleeved shirt and a hat on backward. He came in to the bathroom and I asked him, “Can I give you a hug!?” Of course, he looked at me weird at first, but then smiled and said yes. As I hugged him I sort of looked up at what would be the ceiling, suddenly we were spinning as if I were going somewhere. I had this constant idea that he was taking me somewhere. But the feeling of complete and utter fulfillment came over my body both in my dreams and in reality, as I was standing there in my uncle’s embrace.
I’m not usually one type my corny dreams on the internet but after thinking so much about how I wanted to hug him one last time, and then him listening to me closely enough to come to me in my dreams, was the most satisfying thing that could ever happen to me, after his death.
Not long after he passed he came to Aurora’s dreams as well. But, I will save that for another post, because this one is emotional as it is. Her detail of what she saw is absolutely amazing, and I think will have a lot of you readers in chills!
So, I dedicate this post to my late uncle Joshua Dean Thrasher, the older brother I never had. I love you so much, and I hope to see you again soon.